Good news all around!

I think (not to jinx it) the ants are gone! I guess my minefield of bait did its job!
Which means... I can set up my minefield of pillows I've been wanting for years! I want my new apartment to have the supreme lazy comfort of lounging around like in ancient Rome... grapes included! Dressing in a sheet is allowed as long as it stays on. ;)

Also, I went dancing last night for the first time since moving. It was awesome. It was west coast swing, which is one of my favorites (the others being lindy hop and salsa). Sometimes "west coast people" are kinda (ok, very) snobby, but those were few and far between last night, it seemed.
My old dance teacher from 10 years ago was there, and she hasn't aged a day... same haircut even.
I saw one of the other people I danced with regularly in that same timeframe all those years ago, and he actually recognized me! His leading style is less forceful now, which I guess is good for most people, but I actually liked it better back then. :P
I also saw someone else who was in my old circle of dancers. I knew I might see him, and I was prepared. I had to be prepared, because back in Corvallis, when I was in high school and dancing my little legs off to fight suicidal urges, he molested me several times, starting shortly after I was raped. I didn't know that I was allowed to say no. I thought that this was how the adult world really worked -- that everyone would only ever want me for my body, and it was my responsibility to give it freely. That it was my role to play, my lot in life. Anyway, he ignored me and I ignored him, which I guess is good. If he had talked to me, I was all fired up and ready to say with a scowl on my face, "You will not speak to me or touch me ever again. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

Things have been really strained and frustrating with Sunrise lately, but yesterday we had a very long conversation and came to many healthy understandings, and now things are better than better.

Also, (again, not to jinx it) I'm almost done with the flu. My chest congestion is almost gone, and I am almost back to my regular singing ability, and I had plenty of energy for dancing last night.

I'm going to eat breakfast now, and revel in the fact that I can eat, because that is not always possible for me.

Not very Buddhist of me...

I know I'm supposed to love and respect all sentient beings and such, but...

FUCK ANTS.

Tasty Face

My skincare routine has greatly improved since moving to Portland. I think not having to worry about taking up the bathroom makes quite a bit of difference. Also, my skincare routine makes my face smell like tomatoes and walnuts.

Today at work I was hallucinating. Just little things, like seeing extra hair on a client's arm, and fabric attached to the door, and if I stared at them long enough they would fade away. I'm sure it was a mix of cough syrup and lack of sleep and food and water, but it still makes me worry a bit.

Ok, falling asleep. NyQuil is potent stuff. G'night, all.

Irony's a bitch.

I swear, the universe is fucking with me.

Universe: "Oh, you want to be an independent adult and take care of yourself, huh?"
Me: "Yes please."
U: "Can you take care of yourself when you're sick? Here's the flu."
M: "Fine. I've been sick before."
U: "Big girl, huh? Well then, can you take care of yourself with less money from taking sick time off work? And ooh, they might see you as undependable now."
M: "..."
U: "Nice to see you got yourself home in the rain without too much whining. Go warm up; you have a radiator and a space heater and a microwave to heat up that rice bag you like to put on your tummy and you can have hot water with lemon."
M: "That'll be so nice."
U: "Oops, blown fuse! Did I do that?"
M: "FFFFFUUUUUUUUUU--"

How To See Yourself As You Really Are

By His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Highlights from Part 1: The Need For Insight

(apologies if they seem out of order; the blogger app is kinda stupid. :/ )

Beethoven's 5th

I have to do responsible stuff today! I have to do laundry, which means I have to go to the store and get detergent and dryer sheets. I also have to get ramen (part of your balanced breakfast), ibuprofen, tweezers, a mirror, mouthwash, olive oil, coconut oil, ice, toner, a plug for my bathtub so it can live up to its title, aaaaaand... that might be it. That's a lot. I'm going to have to take my little red wagon. Squee!

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I hope my new neighbor appreciates my taste in music, because I am LOVING playing music while showering. I've been playing my classical playlist. I think every shampoo rinse should be accompanied by an impressive crescendo. ;)

A welcome change...

I'm feeling really good and healthy today... Plenty of energy and a robust appetite. It's about damn time. :)

In other, somewhat related news, I'm trying to decide whether to make a big, intimate, important blog post. I know I said in my first post that this blog was to be my refreshingly unfiltered outlet, but I gotta say--this topic is really giving me pause.

On the lighter side, I have very much enjoyed some kitty time lately. :)

EATING IS MY FAVORITE

Tonight I had a pita for dinner and so far I haven't thrown it up!!!

Yay for eating!

Big city lights

3am thoughts:

It never gets dark here. Ever since I moved, I've been waking up around now and had trouble getting back to sleep. For some reason, every time, I always check the clock first, then look out the window.  And every time, I am surprised to see an eerie orange sky. The first time, it took me a bit to realize it was from all the lights illuminating the atmosphere. Every time since, I immediately am aware of that; so why am I still surprised? I guess it's just one more thing to get used to.
Silly small town girl.

Hello Portland

Some pictures from my new town.

In other news, tired. Stressed. Grateful for work.

Welp, Portland.

So... Here I am.

Two interviews down, one more today. Then maybe a callback from yesterday's?

Grey sky out there today; what did I expect?